Giants Fans Guide to 2007 Playoffs

The playoffs begin today, whoopie, because the Giants are not in it. For those more into baseball right now, here's one Giants fan's historic guide to rooting interests:

• Chicago Cubs vs. D-backs: The Cubs stole the manager Sabean was targeting first, Piniella (not that I wanted him, but still), then snatched Alfonso Soriano away from us in the free agent market (it could have been Bonds in LF, Soriano in CF). However, they are facing the D-backs first, and I hate all NL West competitors. I'm rooting for the Cubs to win here, but lose in the NL Championship (hopefully in a Bartman type of way so that they REALLY think the gods are out to get them). I expect them to lose anyway, the Cubs have great pitching all the way around, the D-backs only have had good bullpen, only Webb was really good in the regular season. Plus they have Livan, another reason for us to root against them, hope he does as well as he did in the 7th game and blow it for them horribly.
• Colorado vs. Phillies: Again, hate all NL West competitors, particularly the Rockies since their SS Troy Tulo-snitch-ki is a life-long A's fan from the East Bay and hates the Giants with a passion. Same to you Buddy! Hope the Phillies sweep their asses home in a humiliating way, then win the NL Championship to get to the World Series. I also expect the Phillies to win; against anyone else, the Rockies appear to have been on such a huge streak that no one can stop them, but the Phillies have been on a similarly huge streak. Unstoppable force, meet immovable object. Somethings going to break, and I think the Phillies have more.
• The Angels The Angels vs. Red Sox: Hmm, a team that Tattoo from Fantasy Island would love or an idiot with a blog who is a pitcher with blood (or catsup) on his sock and who wrote disparaging things about Barry when it was none of his business. Nothing to really appeal to a Giants, but since they cost us 2002, I hope the Red Sox sweep the Angels all the way back to their thumb-sucking Rally Monkey, but with Schilling crushed with, like, 6 runs given up in a third of an inning, in his only start. Then they can lose in the next round. No specific expectations, don't really care for either team, so like Dr. No said to Bonds, "I expect you to DIE!"
• Cleveland vs. Yankees: Gotta hate the Yankees, plus if A-Rod stinks up the joint in the playoffs, King George will say "extension my fat fanny!" and let A-Rod go free agent and seriously hold to their promise not to bid for him; one less bidder mean more chance the Giants have of signing him. If anything, we Giants fans owe the Indians for 1954, so I'm rooting for the Indians to win the series and the AL Championship. I couldn't believe it at the end when I saw that Cleveland not only was on top of the AL Central, but competing for best record. They have great pitching in Sabathia, Carmona, and great hitters in Sizemore and Hafner, so I expect a tough battle but that they will pull it out like they did all season long and come up on top.

Obviously, I'm hoping for Phillies vs. Indians in the World Series. If it did really work out this way, I guess I will root for the Indians for the karma of 1954, though that would remove ANOTHER team which hasn't won the World Series in a longer period than the Giants. We lost Red Sox and the White Sox in recent years, and I think that would leave the Cubs as the only other club with a longer streak. I also expect that the Indians would come out on top in such a meeting, their pitching is so good, but I would be OK with either team winning, as long as they make it exciting.